7 real life problems and tips to overcome them
No matter big or small, problems in life are inevitable. It’s up to you whether to feel down and curse your life problems or have the right mindset to overcome them. As people who don’t give up in adversity and have the perseverance to learn from problems are the ones, who thrive and become successful.
I have myself faced 300 rejections while building my startup. Thus, from my experience, I would like to share tips to overcome typical seven real-life problems.
1. How to handle failures in life? Why does it happen to me?
I typically look at failures as lessons. We all have different risk appetites. One thing that I feel is extremely important for all youngsters to understand is that failure is part of life. If you never took a risk, you would not fail either. However, that by default is the very definition of failure, i.e. if you do nothing then it is the worst kind of failure.
Failure and success are the two sides of the same coin and should be taken with the same equanimity. Successful people are also the ones who have failed the most or learnt fastest from others, and their own failures. It is wrong to think that failures happen only to you. Take a look at every single successful person in any field, and you will see how many times they have failed, brushed it off, and kept pushing their limits.
The only advice I have is to adopt an attitude of fast failure and rapid prototyping in life. Anything you do, push it hard and do not try to go slow.
2. Every friend of mine is earning more than me; it makes me feel down. How do I overcome it?
There will always be people who have something more than us. The point of our existence is not to earn more than others, be more successful than others, or compete in such a manner. I believe that the point of our existence is to create, innovate, build value, be a nice person, and leave behind a positive legacy that people will remember. If we work for what is mentioned previously, we would realize, money is a by-product of what we do.
We should focus on doing what we want to do to the best of our abilities. I strongly believe that benchmarking ourselves against others in terms of pay or any other fields is a fallacy. We should only try to be better than who we were the day before. This constant attempt to be a better person is what yields the best results in the long-term.
3. There is so much work stress in my life, how should I overcome it?
We all face stress in many different forms. I find three ways very useful to deal with stress.
a) First, support from family, who understand and support me in my initiatives. Most things that I have done in my career have been very uncertain, and without the support of my wife or my parents, I could never have succeeded. They are the cushion that allows me to take the risk and do unconventional things.
b) Second, focus on what is really relevant in life. Most of us, focus on the irrelevant petty issues that infuriate us and do not allow us to see beyond the immediate needs. Life is not a 20-20 match in cricket, as it does not get over in a day. It is more like a test match where every day is a session that you not only have to win but on most days, survive to see it to the end. Thus, I create a long-term goal plan that allows me to look beyond the immediate needs of my business or my life and allows me to ignore the daily stress.
c) Third, I have a way of retreating in my mind and ignoring the world around me when stress gets too much. This is a defence mechanism that allows me to focus. I switch off my phone, shut the door, and regroup my thoughts to allow me to prioritize what needs to be done. Every problem is essentially a set of smaller problems. So, while the main problem may seem too big and impossible to solve, the smaller problems are not so difficult to overcome.
4. How can I stop being average?
In a world of 7 billion people, there are very few who are exceptional. Most of us allow life to determine where we land up. The exceptional people, through sheer talent, determination, and focus change the trajectory of their lives. People who are more exceptional end up changing the lives of many people around them completely. And the truly extraordinary ones though end up changing the course of history. There is little agreement on what makes someone extraordinary, and what does not make one extraordinary.
Thus, my strong belief is that a combination of luck, ability to grasp the opportunity, sheer determination and ability to persevere are the determinants of whether you remain average or become extraordinary.
5. How do I find the purpose of my life?
The only way to find the purpose of life is to live life searching for it. For some, it comes easily, but for most, you may spend your life not finding it. It also has to do with what you do with what has been given to you. Most times, we set the expectations so high or the reason so wrong that finding the purpose becomes impossible. You do not become a businessman to do philanthropy, it can be a hobby. You do not do philanthropy to become famous, it could be a side effect. So, keep searching and ensure your reasons are right.
6. How do I accept the fact that I am not pretty?
By finding what you are good at, AR Rahman is not pretty, Sachin Tendulkar is not good looking. Beauty is not skin deep. We need to rise beyond the shallow trappings of physical beauty. True beauty lies in every one of us. We need to find it and be happy with our looks. Remember, when we are young, it is easy to fall into the trap of social validation. But, the only real validation we need is from our own selves.
7. How do I overcome my addiction to social media?
By creating a schedule. If you are using social media for work, then restrict it to work hours as far as possible. If you are a businessman for whom social media makes a lot of difference, then you cannot avoid it completely. But, if you are using social media for connecting with people, then keep fixed hours, and set times on these apps to make sure you do not use them beyond the limit. Nowadays, Youtube and some other apps come prebuilt with a feature to limit usage.
But most important, your willpower is what will determine the outcome. Same as any other addiction, your success is determined by you.
An ex-naval officer, he is the CEO and co-founder of Eunimart. The company has grown through leaps and bounds as it has partnered with big companies like Amazon, eBay, Etsy etc.
